"See what starving will do to you...growing up hard in a little apartment will do to you..." -Jay-Z
The new year has arrived, and I have been processing how I feel about my life, and about where I stand in my little world. And this year, I have decided that I will take on a whole new agenda...
THIS TIME...I AM LOOKING OUT FOR SELF.
Now don't get me wrong, I still plan on being the same caring, socially conscious, humanitarian that I have been in my past years-it is just my nature to care. But I have noticed that alot of my caring for others has been too overwhelming...to the point that I haven't really had time to take care fo self, and that is very important in these days and times. What good would I be to those who love me and whom I love if I can't be at peak performance for myself first.
My Self- Preservation will go a little like this:
Spiritually- I am beginning to feel like my life is slowly losing control, and that reminds me that I am not letting the TRUE pilot guide my ship. I am in the process of allowing GOD to come into my life and make the changes and moves that he desires to make in my life. I feel that with him directing my path, I will be able to see more of what I need in my life, and in those places where I can't see my path, I don't have to worry- not like I am driving anyway. This, to me, is probably the most extreme change I have to make, since for so long, I kinda felt that I had my fate in my hands. I don't...
Socially- I still feel that I can be a giving and loving person to others, but not to the point of letting others take advantage of me. You know, the hardest thing with which I have had to deal is to know that sometimes people will take advantage of you regardless of if they love you or not. It doesn't mean that they care less for me, but that they probably don't know how to interact with others appropriately. How will I teach them?...by helping those who help themselves. This year, everyone can get my love, but those who don't appreciate it will be limited in their access.
Health- The most precious gift I have been given is my body. My body is the vessel for my soul, and therefore should be treated as such. I haven't done a good job of taking care of my temple. Over-eating, lack of exercise, and other carnalities have proven me to be iconoclastic towards the one gift that I should cherish the most. Not anymore! NO MORE DOLLAR MENUS AT MCDONALD'S. NO MORE "HOT DOUGHNUTS" FROM KRISPY KREME. This is definitely the year of the six pack, and I plan to resculpt my entire frame for health and for appearance sake. Its the least I can do to show appreciation for this wonderful gift that I have been given.
Hopefully, when I make these changes, then by the end of the year, the world will see the new me, the true me, the me that I deserve to be.
Friday, January 14, 2005
Thursday, January 06, 2005
New Semester/New Challenges
Okay, so the new semester is starting, and I am excited. I honestly feel a tad bit more secure and optimistic about this semester...moreso than last semester. I am thrilled about my project, which is finally getting off the ground, and I am also happy about being stress-free. What a way to start off the new year.
For my project, I am testing to see how calcium affects the genes involved in heart contractions. To put it simply, we will expose a mammalian heart (rat or rabbit) to calcium, and see if we get any genetic products afterwards. This is interesting to me because I have always been interested in whole-heart and whole organ physiology and function. Furthermore, my lab has been kinda one-dimensional before I came, so now we can expand our scope ot encompass more areas of cardiac research. I feel like such an asset.
I am doing animal surgeries as well. Last semester I did the surgeries on rats alone. This semester, I get to do rabbits and rats, which require two totally different techniques. Furthermore, I get to perform the operations by myself. Am I a geek or what?
My mom and I played Jeopardy by phone yesterday, and I have come to realize that I am a nerd by design...it was genetically bestowed upon me. Mom and I have played Jeopardy together since I was about 10, and now that we realize that we can do it by phone, it will probably go on until I can get on the actual show. I feel like Rosie Perez in "White Men Can't Jump."
"You know what a quince is, Billy? It's a food Billy...a food that starts with the letter "Q"!!!"
-Rosie
I also realize that my dad, no matter how hard of a soul he can be to others, is really a big softie when it comes to me...his son. He calls every day to check on me, as if I am at summer camp or something. Now he never makes it seem like it is his idea...he always says, " Uh, your momma was curious about your well-being, son" or something like that. Just a big ole softie.
The new year has been good to me. I already see that school and family are both in perfect alignment with my paths for this year. Wish me luck!!!
For my project, I am testing to see how calcium affects the genes involved in heart contractions. To put it simply, we will expose a mammalian heart (rat or rabbit) to calcium, and see if we get any genetic products afterwards. This is interesting to me because I have always been interested in whole-heart and whole organ physiology and function. Furthermore, my lab has been kinda one-dimensional before I came, so now we can expand our scope ot encompass more areas of cardiac research. I feel like such an asset.
I am doing animal surgeries as well. Last semester I did the surgeries on rats alone. This semester, I get to do rabbits and rats, which require two totally different techniques. Furthermore, I get to perform the operations by myself. Am I a geek or what?
My mom and I played Jeopardy by phone yesterday, and I have come to realize that I am a nerd by design...it was genetically bestowed upon me. Mom and I have played Jeopardy together since I was about 10, and now that we realize that we can do it by phone, it will probably go on until I can get on the actual show. I feel like Rosie Perez in "White Men Can't Jump."
"You know what a quince is, Billy? It's a food Billy...a food that starts with the letter "Q"!!!"
-Rosie
I also realize that my dad, no matter how hard of a soul he can be to others, is really a big softie when it comes to me...his son. He calls every day to check on me, as if I am at summer camp or something. Now he never makes it seem like it is his idea...he always says, " Uh, your momma was curious about your well-being, son" or something like that. Just a big ole softie.
The new year has been good to me. I already see that school and family are both in perfect alignment with my paths for this year. Wish me luck!!!
New Semester/New Challenges
Okay, so the new semester is starting, and I am excited. I honestly feel a tad bit more secure and optimistic about this semester...moreso than last semester. I am thrilled about my project, which is finally getting off the ground, and I am also happy about being stress-free. What a way to start off the new year.
For my project, I am testing to see how calcium affects the genes involved in heart contractions. To put it simply, we will expose a mammalian heart (rat or rabbit) to calcium, and see if we get any genetic products afterwards. This is interesting to me because I have always been interested in whole-heart and whole organ physiology and function. Furthermore, my lab has been kinda one-dimensional before I came, so now we can expand our scope ot encompass more areas of cardiac research. I feel like such an asset.
I am doing animal surgeries as well. Last semester I did the surgeries on rats alone. This semester, I get to do rabbits and rats, which require two totally different techniques. Furthermore, I get to perform the operations by myself. Am I a geek or what?
My mom and I played Jeopardy by phone yesterday, and I have come to realize that I am a nerd by design...it was genetically bestowed upon me. Mom and I have played Jeopardy together since I was about 10, and now that we realize that we can do it by phone, it will probably go on until I can get on the actual show. I feel like Rosie Perez in "White Men Can't Jump."
"You know what a quince is, Billy? It's a food Billy...a food that starts with the letter "Q"!!!"
-Rosie
I also realize that my dad, no matter how hard of a soul he can be to others, is really a big softie when it comes to me...his son. He calls every day to check on me, as if I am at summer camp or something. Now he never makes it seem like it is his idea...he always says, " Uh, your momma was curious about your well-being, son" or something like that. Just a big ole softie.
The new year has been good to me. I already see that school and family are both in perfect alignment with my paths for this year. Wish me luck!!!
For my project, I am testing to see how calcium affects the genes involved in heart contractions. To put it simply, we will expose a mammalian heart (rat or rabbit) to calcium, and see if we get any genetic products afterwards. This is interesting to me because I have always been interested in whole-heart and whole organ physiology and function. Furthermore, my lab has been kinda one-dimensional before I came, so now we can expand our scope ot encompass more areas of cardiac research. I feel like such an asset.
I am doing animal surgeries as well. Last semester I did the surgeries on rats alone. This semester, I get to do rabbits and rats, which require two totally different techniques. Furthermore, I get to perform the operations by myself. Am I a geek or what?
My mom and I played Jeopardy by phone yesterday, and I have come to realize that I am a nerd by design...it was genetically bestowed upon me. Mom and I have played Jeopardy together since I was about 10, and now that we realize that we can do it by phone, it will probably go on until I can get on the actual show. I feel like Rosie Perez in "White Men Can't Jump."
"You know what a quince is, Billy? It's a food Billy...a food that starts with the letter "Q"!!!"
-Rosie
I also realize that my dad, no matter how hard of a soul he can be to others, is really a big softie when it comes to me...his son. He calls every day to check on me, as if I am at summer camp or something. Now he never makes it seem like it is his idea...he always says, " Uh, your momma was curious about your well-being, son" or something like that. Just a big ole softie.
The new year has been good to me. I already see that school and family are both in perfect alignment with my paths for this year. Wish me luck!!!
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