Protecting Our Women

Women are the strongest creatures I know. Point blank. I realize that physical strength is something that is usually dominated by men, but mental and emotional strength is something that is very powerful in our women, and it is this strength that I admire so much. With that said, I am writing this with tears in my eyes as I think about what our women have to endure.

I saw the short film "Bid Em In" on BET, which talks about selling of slaves, and they showed how a Black woman would be advertised for their bodies and abilities to produce children. Yet in 2007, not much has changed. So many of our women have been exploited, both commercially and locally, by us...men. And in all honesty, we do it without realizing exactly what the impact is that we are having on the esteem of women as whole.

In talking with many of my female friends and colleagues, it really amazes me how many of them have been victims of sexual/emotional/physical abuse at the hands of a man. About 90% of my female friends and family fall into being victims of one of those three categories, yet to look at them, all you see is strength and that smile that hides the pain that they have endured. I'm talking more than just a bad relationship, but rapes, and molestation, and domestic violence, etc. And they may deal with their past in many ways. Some may suppress it and push on. Some may develop a profound distrust of men. Some may accept this as their fate and become allow themselves to be used in these fashions. What's even more disturbing to me is that many men approach women in these same traumatic ways without any regard to the possibility of what they may have gone through in the past (and I used to do the same thing, so I really understand how mindless it can be to come at a woman that way without thinking about the repercussions). And though we may get responses that seem positive to us, it may be that we are adding to the trauma that was placed on them during their innocence.

So I guess this is my plea to my brothers to change the game, and how we treat our women. Being a sincere gentleman (not just the gentleman that is nice until he gets some) is a small gesture that every man can do to add to the security of our women, and to support them through what they are going through. Letting our women know that we are there for them for more than just how they look or what pleasure they can provide will go a long way towards helping rebuild our social and mental bond with the female gender. Uplifting women who may have even forgotten their own self-worth could start the trend towards better dialogue and stronger relationships between both sides. Because the bottom line is...whenever you approach a woman for what may seem like playful chase, you never know what wounds you are actually in danger of re-opening.